2013 was lackluster, to be frank.
I spent a weekend in Mexico, I tried several times to earn myself a promotion, I was invited to a workshop to enhance my work skills, my brother got married, I got to spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with my family. I was evacuated for 41 days, and slept on a couch for 42 days. I lost a precious-to-me heirloom that I’ll never see again.
I went on a few dates, most boring or interesting but I did not hold enough appeal to warrant a second date. I stood firm in my resolve to not just hook up with boys; one transgression in a year is pretty good. (Resort flings are not as glamourous as the novels tell you.)
My wanderlust nags at the middle of my mind all the time. It’s not quite screaming but it’s not whispering, either. Plans to go afar for my birthday have been cancelled and a possible spring trip may take its place.
I feel stuck, caged in. I know I am in a rut and feel trapped but I have no idea how to make changes stick. Getting into the habit of brushing my teeth twice a day has been a six-month experiment that’s had several weeks of forgetting to brush at night. How the hell am I going to find the willpower to make other changes?
Friends in this city are scarce. The ones I have are absolutely fantastic, the three ladies I can always count on. E, A, and Y are the most wonderful young ladies that I am thrilled to be friends with. My friends back home…. there is a distance. Admittedly, I am not the greatest at staying in touch, but I do make an effort to converse with and stay in their loops. Feels to me like many of them said their goodbyes when I moved in 2012. Going to camps leaves me with a bitter taste in my mouth as the people I thought were at least my “camp friends” barely have time to say hi anymore. (I think I have crashed my last moot.)
Resolutions tend to set us up for failure so I’m not setting any this year. I will continue to work on my reading list and life list – suggestions for life list always welcome; I have enough books on my list! Some of these things I won’t be able to complete this year, but I can do others and I will.
2013 was a dull grey with a few bright patches.
Bring it on, 2014. I want a life with more sparkle.